*I decided to challenge myself and write in a different style today. This is an attempt at spoken word / rap*
A text on my phone said "man we're promoting you." An unprecedented opportunity considering the life I've been living through. Gratefulness and excitement filled me up - fighting tears on the way home as the realization struck - what I thought would never happen is beginning to play out, my life is turning into what I only dreamed about. After long periods of having the shit kicked out of you, a respit comes giving a moment to breathe, emotions you've been holding back, begin to seep - out through the joints as you let down the guard when no one's around crying in your car.
I don't think that I deserve it because I've tried real hard, or been through tough times many wouldn't survive. When I stopped fighting, pushing, praying, striving - the closer I got to the top of this mountain I'm climbing. Taking credit would be asinine I know my ass out of nine cause I've had it handed to me about a hundred thousand times.
Talked to a guy who's world is changing too, said his life used to ride on square tires locked with a boot. A wake up call he answered, some hard knocks too, now he's rolling like a Bugatti gassed up with jet fuel. I said "when you don't avoid the bumps it rounds that shit out - knocking corners off in little chunks" its a gradual change like some fucked up geometry that changes the plane. When you avoid difficulties they're just displaced - another chance down the road to fall on your face.
I wouldn't go back and change my struggles if I could, just alter my responses served up on the altar of my life. The gods of fate don't give a shit, they'll protract your life indefinite. Slow down, relax, make the best of where you're at but don't let your dreams go they will work out - cause when you head down the rough road eventually it all smooths out.