Friday, March 21, 2014

Patience - Love on Tap

Something my mother always told me as a child is that I had very little patience and unfortunately she was right. I hated waiting for anything because if things didn't happen immediately I would just forget about it and move onto something else. It's not that I was a spoiled brat - quite the opposite. I just was so used to doing without things and not having a voice that if I had to wait any length of time I figured it was never going to happen so why keep up my expectations and hope unnecessarily. As I've gotten older, I've realized that there are things worth holding out and holding on for and they do happen if you bide your time. My career is a prime example as it took a very difficult 9 year journey to get where I am today. Many times I thought I was never going to get where I wanted and it looked like time to give up and be "reasonable" but patience and persistence have paid off.

As I'm seeing how patience is playing into my life in relation to love, it seems like patience isn't actually a separate virtue from the "greatest virtue - love" but is love on tap. Waiting is denying yourself gratification, having hope, exercising self-control. Anyone can love for a few days, a week, maybe even a year but when you must wait with no definite end in sight - then you will see what you are made out of. When I got married it wasn't for love - it was about a lack of options and having no clue about life. If you have options but set your sights tenaciously on the object of your affection whether it be a person, possession or position (I just threw up a little for alliterating) - then you are living out a constant stream of love as long as you don't falter. Even self-sacrifice can take time off but waiting isn't something you can take a break from you. You either let love and hope flow or you dry up and quit.

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