Saturday, January 30, 2016

Living As An Alien

I just finished a conversation with a buddy, who was once my boss at a job where I finally snapped under pressure and subconsciously-intentionally got myself fired. In the course of chatting I mentioned "so and so, I can't figure that dude out". "You took all our shit talking seriously didn't you" he asked. "Yeah" I said, "we weren't allowed to joke around as kids and nothing was good enough for my mother. Everything was serious."

"My dad told me, 'believe half of what you see, and less of what you hear' - that's how I grew up" he said. It finally hit me - life has felt so hard because I thought everything was real. 

I imagine when most kids break through the bubble (at whatever age it is that most children venture off to school) there's some discomfort but you adjust to the real world fairly quickly. For me it felt like someone stretched that bubble back like a rubber band and let it go about three years back. That motherfucker stung like a son-of-a-bitch! Life has felt so hard because of the perspective I was programmed with. Someone call Will Smith - I am an alien.

Talking to a color blind co-worker recently about his affliction, I though "I wonder how any of us know that what we see as blue looks the same as someone else's blue?" For the record, my blue is really fucking weird but I'm cool with that. I'm trying to adjust and understand that when other people say "purple" but the tone sounds like blue, it's probably actually orange. 

It's a crazy world that makes very little sense to me. We're all just quarks (or whatever is smaller than that) in the grand scheme of the entire universe(s), so keep painting away. I'm going to sit here and observe how you earthlings do things and try to figure out why I was sent to watch you. It's a mad, mad world. 

Tschüss 

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